Personal Growth

While many begin therapy in order to solve a specific problem or work on a well-defined issue that is negatively impacting their lives, some are interested in pursuing a broader, more generalized therapeutic experience to address a sense of paralysis or nagging restlessness. The hope is that therapy can stimulate new realizations and discoveries.

Whatever the originating motivation to pursue treatment may be, all successful therapies should ultimately promote emotional and psychological growth.

There are many different conceptions of growthin mental health. From my perspective, the most compelling include the achievement of greater autonomy and creativity; successfully moving through an important developmental milestone or transition; overcoming a chronic conflict or dilemma; and identifying new sources of satisfaction and personal fulfillment, in one’s work, in one’s professional life, and/or in one’s creative and spiritual life.

Often, growth corresponds to finally making a decision or resolving a problem or long-term issue that has been the status quo. To support the patient’s growth, the psychotherapeutic space provides a safe haven that does not condone the status quo, but deepens the patient’s awareness of his or her investment in the familiar, in what has stymied the pursuit of new possibilities and alternative directions.

It has been my experience that when patients grow in psychotherapy, what occurs has less to do with skill development or the attainment of new knowledge or insight. Rather, what occurs is more akin to liberation, a breaking from whatever has previously functioned in one’s life as kind of prison. That which is imprisoning, mentally, emotionally, and relationally, is difficult to recognize and even more challenging to overcome once it has been identified.

Forged in early development, an individual’s personality, emotional states, interpersonal tendencies, and cognitions/perceptual style are infused with adaptive coping strategies necessary to address whatever stressors were relevant in one’s particular circumstances. Like anything else, these adaptive mechanisms and strategies eventually become outdated and either are no longer necessary or end up producing more damage than providing assistance. They become a burden, really, shackles that are hindering more so than protective.

From this perspective, the growth inspired by psychotherapy involves finally splitting from, or entirely fracturing, these shackles; what is retained is the patient’s authentic identity, who a person is and what he or she really wants. At its best, psychotherapy offers this clarify.

Visit Dr. Tobin's Office

15615 Alton Parkway
Suite 450
Irvine, CA 92618

Hours
Monday: 8am - 8pm
Tuesday: 8am - 8pm
Wednesday: 8am - 8pm
Thursday: 8am - 8pm
Friday: 8am - 8pm
Saturday: Closed
Sunday: Closed