The Key Components of Successful Couples Therapies

In my experience with couples who have achieved successful therapies, an important shift occurs in the treatment in which each partner’s personal areas of growth and potential become identified, accepted and worked on, within the context of an increasingly supportive relationship.

Even in situations of infidelity, severe emotional injury, and experiences resulting in profound mistrust suffered as a result of the actions of one’s partner, an indicator of successful therapy is that both partners find something within themselves they each need to address or improve, for their own sake as well as for the sake of all their relationships including the one with his/her partner.

In successful therapies, what is discovered is the ways in which one’s personal history including family-of-origin issues, personality tendencies, defense mechanisms, fears and anxieties, and unresolved injuries suffered at earlier points in the current relationship all contribute to the forming and persistence of dysfunctional dynamics.

Moreover, as each partner gains a greater awareness of the contribution of their own issues to problems in the relationship, they can appreciate the interlocking quality of how they come together and, despite their strengths, hit turbulence. Who is at fault becomes far less important than how they co-mingle in limiting and self-defeating ways.

And the final indicator of a good couples therapy is that each partner becomes attuned to the other’s limitations and issues more empathically and with greater specificity. When your partner becomes your coach, and you allow and welcome his/her insights, ideas and perceptions as sources of positive change and growth, the relationship achieves a new level of vitality and viability.

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15615 Alton Parkway
Suite 450
Irvine, CA 92618

Hours
Monday: 8am - 8pm
Tuesday: 8am - 8pm
Wednesday: 8am - 8pm
Thursday: 8am - 8pm
Friday: 8am - 8pm
Saturday: Closed
Sunday: Closed