Ross Rosenberg, acclaimed clinician and author of The Human Magnet Syndrome, has coined the term “self-love deficit disorder” to describe an emotional-relational syndrome that makes an individual vulnerable to relationships with narcissists. Conceptualized as a more apt term for what is usually referred to as codependency, Rosenberg’s self-love deficit disorder (SLDD) involves a set of conditions (involving “attachment trauma” and corresponding shame) resulting in “pathological loneliness.” The emerging consequence is the compulsive pursuit of a love interest who, paradoxically, cannot love due to his/her own narcissistic problems. The failure to obtain love from this person only supports and re-affirms the inherent shame and inability to be loved that is already felt, which in term further reinforces the compulsion (and, ultimately, addiction) to attain love. In the next virtual meeting of the Relationship Group Seminar on Saturday, August 21, 2021 (11:45 AM to 1:00 PM), we will explore Rosenberg’s notion of SLDD. Specifically, we will discuss (1) Rosenberg’s notion of the “matching” of narcissistic-codependent features in couples and the causes of SLDD; (2) his understanding of how deficits in self-love can be treated and cured; and (3) perspectives on why individuals with self-love deficits have such profound difficulty leaving their relationships with narcissists.

* Registration Directions: If you would like to attend the next virtual meeting of the Relationship Group Seminar on Saturday, August 21, 2021, 11:45 AM to 1:00 PM, please RSVP to me at 949-338-4388 or jt@jamestobinphd.com no later than Thursday, August 19, 2021. The fee is $25.00 (payable before entering the virtual meeting) and informed consent for participation in this telehealth event must be completed prior to the seminar. Please note that the Relationship Group Seminar is psychoeducational in nature, not therapeutic, and does not constitute psychotherapy or counseling.