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The Programming of Our Relational Lives

The Programming of Our Relational Lives

Why do we do what we do in our relationships, often to our own detriment, even when we know what we’re doing is self-sabotaging?     The answer is that we are literally “programmed” to act in ways that are, in essence, automatic — and we...
The Loss of Sexual Passion in Couples

The Loss of Sexual Passion in Couples

The maternal instinct is so strong that it is inevitable that a woman will treat her male lover from  this instinct.  For most women, this is not really a problem at all and, in fact, even bolsters their sense of intimacy and connection with their partners.  In fact,...
What Is “Interdependence?”

What Is “Interdependence?”

At their core, most romantic relationship problems involve conflictual dynamics having to do with the fear of fusion (i.e., anxiety concerning becoming “one”/fearing dependency and union) vs. the fear of independence (i.e., anxiety that involving remaining separate...
James Tobin Ph.D.
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